This week, I painted candles and ended up focusing only on the candlelight, which looked like a pepper. I told myself I would still share it because this is a process where I’m learning and growing. That mini watercolor took the longest. It pushed my skills, and I learned how important good watercolor paper is, and to be patient, or to use a blow dryer to speed up drying. The watercolor paper I have been using is thicker, and I also realized that, with all the layers needed, I didn’t let the paper dry between them. Making the paper overworked and pilled.
Recently, we had a major windstorm that knocked out our power for a couple of days. The first night we didn’t have power, we had a very cozy night. We lit candles and sat close to our fireplace. I read by candlelight and drew in my Cloudle book. It was quiet and relaxed.
Those couple of nights that we didn’t have power, we used candles. We could’ve used lanterns from our camping gear, but the candles were so peaceful, and it was kind of exciting and fun. It was different and allowed our family to just be together, without the everyday distractions.
That first night was fun because it was different. But that second night, it was easier to be bored and feel the need or want to reach for technology to numb the boredom.
That first night, I fondly thought of the tales of Laura Ingalls. I think it’s interesting that I look back on her difficult life with fondness, because let’s be real, those people didn’t have it easy. They milled their own grain, everything, I mean everything, was made from scratch. They didn’t have the resources that we have now. They didn’t even have the medical knowledge we have now (for better or for worse). That second night, I started thinking that this was how their life was every night. And it felt overwhelming. I know they knew nothing different. But for us who do know differently, the constant quiet, darkness, and inability to do the things we normally do at night would be difficult to get into as a life pattern after knowing the difference.
After the transformer was fixed and we got our power back, we returned to our usual nightly routine. TV, tea, reading, etc., what I realized is that in our life right now, with all we have distracting us, having a night where it’s quiet and technology is off is rejuvenating. It allows for creativity to take root. It allows our brain to rest with less stimulating activities, lights, and noises. But what is most important is that it gives us an opportunity to bring our attention to God’s voice. So often in our world today, we distract ourselves because whatever is going on inside is just “too much” to handle.
Yet, I’ve learned that those burdens I would want to hide, numb out, or distract myself from, Jesus was waiting for me to give them to Him. He wasn’t waiting impatiently, and he never left me because I was hanging onto them; He was patient. Gently encouraging me to hand over those burdens to Him. Without quiet, I wasn’t able to learn to hear God’s voice. And since I have begun listening and not just talking, I have found that the things I am most burdened by, whether it’s my overthinking causing anxiety or fear or the unknowns of the future, when I am able to hear what God has to say about them and what I need to do, those burdens are lifted and my anxiety gets less and less.
Just as a candle lights a dark area, God lights our path. He leads us and beckons us. Unlike a candle, whose flame will wither and die, He doesn’t. He never grows tired of taking on your burdens, even if it’s the same anxiety you have been dealing with for years. He continues to take them gladly, unburdening us, but in that process of us going to Him and listening to what He wants us to know, He is slowly helping us trust Him completely so that what once burdened us no longer does.
Laura Ingalls Blog Posts
Laura Ingalls Wilder Homestead Road Trip
They Weren’t Living, They Were Surviving – A Little House on the Prairie Reflection